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Saturday, February 21st, 2004
3:24 am - A bit of a commentary
I've been on-and-off working on the manuscript, but both RL and my life OL have been disrupting me. I've still been thinking about the TWTA people, every now and then I'll come up with a line for one of them or something will happen and I'll think, "Whoa- remember that- that's going in the novel."

Tonight, well, this morning, I started thinking about it enough to write it again. I have a clear-ish idea of where it's going, and I seriously want to finish it.

Awhile ago, a friend in the fanfic community I hang out in, nothingbutfic, asked us about how our worldview or philosophy gets expressed through our writing. I hope this isn't an expression of some dark subconscious thing within me- it's essentially saying that everyone's a hypocrite, groups of people make people stupid, and you are going to get fucked over by practically anyone.

I've realised a couple of things: firstly, that the story is a lot more about Brett than I thought it was when I started it. I don't know what Brett is meant to represent. Maybe what happens to someone when they've been corroded by a system and made to believe in it. What happens when you believe in logic so much that you become illogical and senseless. Maybe Brett is symbolic of what I fear the education system is doing to people. I'm not sure.

Speaking of Brett, his whole fucked-up-ness is seriously, well, sad. I don't quite know why again- because he's a fairly ruthless creature, but in his own way, he's been made to be ruthless, and he's lost his sense of self while everyone thinks he's so bloody perfect and together. And he is passionate about a couple of things- his thing about music, for one, and it's almost touching.

Anyway, I just put Chapter Five up and out. I'm getting back into it... *nods*

current mood: thoughtful

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Tuesday, November 25th, 2003
2:58 pm
Well, I haven't had a computer at home to work from for the past two weeks and I've heard that I'll be getting it back tonight. Cross you fingers for me.

I'm at work typing this. Urgh.

I've been plotting and writing things in longhand- I HATE writing in longhand, but sometimes that urge just grabs you.

I want to finish it. Well, at least get 50,000 words of it done before NaNo is over. Call me insane, but I want to.

I will finish that fucking novel. Even if it kills me.

current mood: determined

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Monday, November 10th, 2003
12:24 am
I just hit over 20,000 words tonight.

Am in a reasonably good mood about it. More plottage has happened, and it's getting political.

I am in need of a name for Monica's school. It's private, all-girls' and Catholic, and needs something snootier-sounding than "St. Whoever's College." Anyway, Brett goes to St. Ignatius. Damn. Need to learn Latin, like, yesterday, so I copuld come up with a Catholic school name. >:( Someone should write a "Catholic school name" generator.

For the people I said I was putting some in-jokes in to- there's already some in Chapter Three, but there's even more on the way. *grins*

I have a splitting headache, but I'm in a very good mood right now.

current mood: amused

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Tuesday, November 4th, 2003
2:43 am
NaNoWriMo Progress Meter

WAAAAH! Haven't written anything today.

Have been reading The Fountainhead and am insanely jealous that I can't write like Ayn Rand. :(

Must write tonight.

current mood: contemplative

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Saturday, November 1st, 2003
2:27 pm - It starts...
So, I get to start today. Have procratinated too much... but I have a soundtrack for this one now... :)

Okay. Must get offline and start writing. *wibbles*

Good luck, everyone.

current mood: creative

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Sunday, October 26th, 2003
10:45 pm - Plottage is gooooood...
*le sigh*

Have spent most of today offline, believe it or not, plotting the NaNo novel, and listening to music. I want to make myself a soundtrack to write to. So far we have Something for Kate on there, Linkin Park, U2, Fiona Apple, You Am I, Lifehouse, and Live... and a few others. I should cross-post this to my NaNo LJ- nano_jess_y0.

Much plottage has happened. Um, warning... All of the characters are utterly dislikable. I come close to liking the teenage kids because I sort of feel sorry for them. Another warning: It gets heavy. Seriously heavy. But it does.

Oh, and there's a death.

There's not meant to be a moral or a lesson or anything cathartic or meaningful about it- it's just about a fucked-up family. There's no Mary-Sueage, either. The teenage daughter (Will either be Monica or Bianca- I'm not sure yet) reminds me of Phil in some ways- she's sort of like Phil with a Daria edge. The father makes my Dad look like John Ritter's character in Problem Child... he's a prick. The mother is nothing at all like my own, and she has a different set of issues to any my Mum has. And the brother... I've only observed people like him from a distance- the rule-bound brown-nosing school prefects with their heads up their arses- and laughed at them.

It's weird, though, but if roleplaying has done anything for me, it's made me really be able to get into the heads of characters I have next to nothing in common with. It's not made me accept the way they have some horrible, shitty attitudes in some cases, but it's made me be able to see where they're coming from, and why they do what they do.

Even though it's NaNo, and it's meant to be easy writing, where you're producing rather than finelining, I have four people like that to get in the heads of. I need a name for the son, too!!! :( Have been reading that Ren Lexander book, The Secret Meaning of Names. Have a few ideas jotted down... I'm thinking the parents would have named him something to suggest that he'd be stoic and emotionless and stable... possibly something to keep the family together, which is how he's being used to a degree in the book.

current mood: creative

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9:24 am - First entry
26th October... 5 days.

I'm nervous, I'm excited, I'm chomping at the bit to actually start writing. I still don't have names for any of my characters.

I've gone with the fucked-up family idea. I know the characters, but I haven't got a title or a plot. Not havign ANYthing resembling a storyline scares the crap outta me.

Have been on the NaNo site... it's amusing... I doubt I'll have much time for it when I'm actually writing.

Just thought I'd update... this is my journal of my novel... how cute... *sighs*

current mood: contemplative

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